Days.


It has been a week since the summer semester began. I am taking 2 classes this summer, Statistics I and Public Speaking. Statistics I is elementary stats, it is OK so far, but Public Speaking is stressful activity.

I took a communication class a year and half ago with the same teacher, as a requirement for a degree, and it was a nightmare. I liked his lectures, even I did not like the subject, because I thought the professor was well-organized, but I was afraid of him - he is not threatening, it's just because of my perception. During the year and half, I did some presentations and thought I was doing better at speaking, so I enrolled in his class again.

The first speech is already done. It was about "the greatest failure." I do not think I have had a "failure" in my life because I do not have any regrets other than that I did not pay serious attention to education when I was in school. I think that this is true: "the level of education strongly influences people's ideas, perspectives, and range of abilities. A higher level of education appears to be associated with greater fluctuation in personal values, beliefs, and goals. In other words, people with higher levels of education may be more open to changing their minds" (cited from "A Speaker's Guidebook") - which means less prejudice with critical thinking. If I had studied hard back then, my life now would have been different because I would have more options in life.

Every single event in the past was a learning opportunity for me, and I think I needed all I experienced to produce the present me. Even events that seem to be useless were actually useful because I needed them to arrive where I am now. One thing I really appreciate from my parents is the inherited ability to easily forget uncomfortable and unhappy experiences, so I can move on.

(I think the core of ones personality is genetic and shaped by individual experiences and environment.)

Surprisingly, I do not remember the details of my bad marriage life with my 2nd ex anymore (divorced 2 years ago). Though, I remember happy things with my 1st ex (divorced 13 years ago).

Now, the 2nd speech will be a Demonstration speech. I will show the audience how to make an origami crane. The third speech will be something related to a quote picked from the professor's list. I picked "Don’t make a habit out of choosing what feels good over choosing what’s good for you. –Eric Thomas, speaker/author."

Many people do not like to change, but just complain and blame others for making their situation negative, and think others need to change. I think just complaining does not help their life. They need to take action to change their situation to make their life more positive. Otherwise, they will waste their life. They usually conclude saying "well, I wish I could change my situation, but I cannot help it." OK, I will introduce another quote here - "Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself –Leo Tolstoy."

R said this quote is for me :

"Real courage is holding on to a still voice in your head that says, “I must keep going.” It’s that voice that says nothing is a failure if it is not final—that voice that says to you, “Get out of bed. Keep going. I will not quit. –Cory Booker, politician"

But I am not sure about that because I often want to quit college. It is tough especially when trying to get an "A" in every class. Doing quilting jobs at home from quilting ladies is much easier and brings me satisfaction. But I anyway continue not to "make a habit out of choosing what feels good over choosing what’s good" for me. I also want to find something I do not know of the world through the education.

"Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. A with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it. An, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on. So Keep looking until you find it. Don’t settle. –Steve Jobs"

Be happy, and have a great day!